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Nostradamus— Urban fantasy at its best

March 28, 2012 in Urban Fantasy

Perhaps it’s the current preoccupation with young adult books, maybe it’s the end of the Mayan calendar hoopla, or we can chalk it up to all the hype surrounding planetary alignments, magnetic pole shifts and birds dropping out of the sky. No matter the cause, people can’t seem to ignore the rumors and misconceptions about 2012. Meanwhile, Pearls keep disappearing and it’s hard to keep people focused on the real question at hand—how to save the pearls.

Proponents of urban fantasy would have us believe that it all stems from the predictions of Nostradamus.  Best known for his book Les Propheties (“The Prophecies”), written in 1555, Nostradamus was a French apothecary and reputed seer who moved out of medicine and into the occult after a trip to Italy. He wrote his first annual almanac in 1550 and gained notoriety amongst the rich and noble, who flocked to him for horoscopes and psychic advice. Unlike true astrologers, Nostradamus had clients supply him with their birth charts—it’s recorded that when he tried to calculate them himself, there were many errors. Sounds like these almanacs were more like their own brand of fantasy and adventure stories of that time.

Les Propheties was Nostradamus’ written project consisting of one thousand mainly French quatrains—these make up the mostly undated prophecies that made him famous. Undated prophecies sound like quite an anomaly to me, which is why I chalk them up to nothing more than urban fantasy and fiction. The publication of this book attracted a following that credits him with predicting many major world events—again, if they’re without dates, it would be like one of us predicting an earthquake in California. We know it may happen, but exactly when is difficult for us to divine. Les Propheties received a mixed reaction when it was published—some people thought Nostradamus was insane, a phony or a servant of evil, while many of the prominent and elite thought the book contained spiritually inspired prophecies.

Feeling threatened by religious fanatics, Nostradamus created a method of hiding his meaning through the use of “Virgilianized” syntax, word games and a mixture of other languages including Latin, Italian, Greek and Provençal. Since the quatrains were written in Middle French, this led to many problems in the translations, resulting in vagueries, metaphors and allusion. Some are so vague that you can conclude they make absolutely no sense, or that they provide justification for any event. Many academic sources maintain that the associations made between world events and his predictions are the result of these mistranslations or misinterpretations.

An example of a glaring inaccuracy is Nostradamus famously predicted prosperity for King Henry II of France just two years before his death in a jousting accident. He might as well have written a fantasy and adventure novel depicting a long life for the king.

Those who believe in the prophecy of 2012 usually fail to identify the quatrain where this prediction is made. In fact, his followers tend to look for matches to events in his quatrains after the events occur. They may as well focus on fantasy and adventure novels, as Nostradamus never directly mentions December 21, 2012.

If after researching Nostradamus, you still want to believe the hype about his prediction of an apocalyptic event in 2012, then you’ll need to ignore the fact that his quatrains extend well beyond 2012—as in all the way to 3790. Clearly, if all of those predictions are correct, then the world cannot possibly end this year.

My suggestion? Go back to reading young adult books in your free time and focus your attention on ways to save the pearls.

Source: Mayanpredictions.net

 

Eliminating zombies apocalypse world style

March 23, 2012 in Apocalypse World

After reading the last blog post from our oh-so-lovely Ethics Officer on killing zombies in an apocalypse world, I came up with some ideas of my own. I figure neither one of us has actually ever met a real life zombie, so who’s to say one of us has more experience than the other?

Using some inspiration from all the science fiction and fantasy books I read, along with a little online research, I developed some other ways for getting rid of the undead. Many of us don’t have guns or know how to use them, so if we find ourselves in survival mode, deep in a post apocalypse world, it’s best to have some ammunition-free options to work with.

Imagine yourself taking a breather or having a moment of adventure romance with your loved one inside a local shopping mall, when all of a sudden, it’s overrun with zombies, Dawn of the Dead style. You want to keep your brains intact but they’re coming for you and you don’t have a gun. This is the perfect time to unleash your machete and go on an undead decapitation spree, severing them right at the neck. Or if you only have a knife on you, you can run up on them and stab them through the brain like they do on The Walking Dead. Clean, quick and simple. All you have to do is keep your machete and knives sharpened at all times.

A less messy way to eradicate the zombie you run into at the park is to throw a little liquid nitrogen at their head followed by a lit match—I’ve read about vampires getting offed that way in several paranormal romance books. All you have to do is keep a water bottle filled with it on you at all times. This keeps the element of surprise, as the zombie will have no idea that it’s not just H20—if they can even think at all. Make sure not to get any on yourself!

If one night your adventure romance is interrupted by one of these rotting creatures knocking at your door, get resourceful. Use furniture, cleaning fluids, bleach, hair spray, pots, pans, forks and whatever else you can find to fight them off. Even a glass vase or mirror smashed over their head may do the trick. You can also use one of the shards of glass or a pair of scissors to spear them through their brain.

Obviously, as we’ve read in many paranormal romance books and seen in science fiction and fantasy films, there are tons of inventive ways to banish the undead. Grenades, molotov cocktails, and those industrial style arrows are other good choices for survival in an apocalypse world. I think the most important thing is to find the method that you’re most comfortable with and can get really good at. Get in the best shape you can, always be alert and on point, and have your method of choice on hand at all times. Sleep with it, eat with it, live with it. Good luck, especially to all the Pearls!

Source: Scottemerson.wordpress.com

by eden

Urban fantasy and balancing acts

March 22, 2012 in Urban Fantasy

Today and the days surrounding are supposedly very powerful—in fact, the perfect time to bring every urban fantasy to life.  They say the days around the spring equinox are the best time to make a list of your goals and focus on making them come true—if that’s the case, then you know I’m focusing on how to save the Pearls and locking down my fantasy romance already!

Planetary Numerologist, John Davis, also the Director of Coptic Fellowship International and President of Spiritual Unity of Nations, wrote that March 21, 2012 is the most important date he has ever analyzed. As it’s exactly nine months before this year’s winter solstice on December 21, whatever seed we plant on and around March 21 will supposedly come true by December 21. That would work out perfectly for me, since we all know that my 18th birthday is right before that. So if I can cement my fantasy romance and mate with Jamal, I will survive my fate.

While some of us are focusing on creating the kind of world we want to live in, one where Pearls, Coals, Ambers and Tiger’s Eyes all live in peace and harmony, without any class system, others are focused on a different kind of young adult fantasy: balancing eggs. Yes, you read that right. Instead of thinking about peace, respect, love and a planet that is full of resources, the egg balancers are springing out of the woodwork. Apparently, it has something to do with the fact that this is one of the only two days each year where the day and night are exactly the same length.

Tales of urban fantasy state that, during the equinox, the position of the sun and other planets during the equinoxes enable miraculous feats of balance to occur. Hmmm. People are literally spending their time propping up eggs and cleaning up the mess when they don’t stand up on their own. They do this every year, despite the fact that astronomers report that equinoxes have no physical effect on objects or balance. Funnily enough, while the egg balancers come out during this time of year, at the fall equinox, these same people try to balance brooms—I’m gonna guess in honor of witches and Halloween.

I’ve read about the broom standers in a few young adult fantasy books—of course, the premise had to do with wizardry and the occult. I’m not going to lie, I tried it when I was little. The brooms just fell each time, knocking me on the forehead once or twice. I chalked it up to the fact that I was a lowly Pearl with no witchy or supernatural powers, and that the broom standers had to be getting a little help from above—or below. I guess I let all the tales of urban fantasy I’d read spark my imagination into believing. At least I didn’t try the messy egg trick!

I’m older now and not quite so gullible. Not to knock anyone’s else’s choices, but since I’m trying to help save the Pearls and my own life, I’m choosing to make a little list and check it more than twice. Plus, I don’t really want to spend my night cleaning up egg yolks.

Source: .indianasnewscenter.com

 

Apocalypse world tips—how to kill zombies safely and efficiently

March 15, 2012 in Apocalypse World

The Walking Dead has little Miss Eden Newman thinking about an important topic—how to endure and survive all the atrocities and threats of an apocalypse world. While Eden brings up an important potential scenario—what to do if a loved one becomes zombified—it’s probably best to focus on one overall strategy for eliminating the riff raff of the undead, former friend or not. There’s no doubt about it, putting these nasty brain-suckers out of their misery is the right thing to do, and the only way to ensure your own survival.

We’ve all seen lots of science fiction and fantasy films and television shows that depict certain ways of killing the undead—a stake through the heart, bullet in the head, decapitation, etc. Successfully killing one of these undead dudes requires solid planning, as well as preparation for a slew of unexpected problems. While the various techniques portrayed in most fiction are interesting enough and make some sense, no one has yet to actually meet a member of the undead, so we have to plan beyond common speculation.  Until I meet someone who has survived an apocalypse world, I will prepare myself for any type of situation.

While most  fantasy and adventure books and movies portray zombies as slow, uncoordinated creatures, who knows if they really can be outrun? In addition to getting in the best possible shape of my life (how else do you think I keep my adventure romance alive? You guessed it, by keeping that booty in shape), I plan to procure the best in running shoes and buy every type of acceleration device known to man during the next few months.

Even if these guys are slow, getting cornered in a confined space with a bunch of them could be fatal. In order to hang onto your brains, it’s best to be strapped and carry a variety of knives to wield at close range. Let’s hope they don’t get close enough for a little adventure romance with you, but if they do, a knife through the brain is probably your best bet.

If you do have time to shoot, make sure to aim directly for their forehead. We’ve all seen too many science fiction and fantasy films where civilians waste a ton of valuable ammunition shooting in the leg or arms. If you’re in an apocalypse world, ammo is bound to be scarce, so save it for the right shot. With that in mind, make sure to start going to a shooting range now to learn gun safety and hone your skills. The last thing you want to do is waste your bullets or bust a cap on some poor human.

If for some reason, you have no ammo left and you’re forced to engage in a little hand-to-hand combat with a member of the undead, it’s good to have some martial arts and knife-wielding skills. Remember, unlike some fantasy and adventure movie where you have nine lives or a loved one who pops up to save you at all the right times, you’re going to have to be on point at all times. One slip up and you could be reduced to a grunting, brain-craving beast limping down the road in a zombie style crip walk. Not fun and not attractive. Start preparing for an apocalypse world, my little Pearly Pearls!

Spurce: Crimlaw.blogspot.com

 

To kill or not to kill—what if the one you love became a zombie?

March 14, 2012 in Apocalypse World

Last night’s brilliant episode of my favorite apocalypse world series, The Walking Dead, really got me thinking. In it, the main character had to shoot the best friend he’d been through thick and thin with in order to survive. While his besty wasn’t yet a zombie, he soon became one and had to be killed twice. This made me start to fantasize, and obviously not in a good way, about what I would do if one of my loved ones actually became a zombie.

If I became a zombie in some apocalypse world scenario, I would definitely want to be off-ed. Becoming a mindless shell wandering the streets, lusting after brains and uttering unintelligible gibberish does not sound very appealing to me—it sounds like straight suffering. While it may be a beautiful thing in a science fiction and fantasy film, it’s just a little too primal for me.

No matter how much you would miss someone, you wouldn’t want them to suffer either. That being said, it would probably be really difficult to have to end a fantasy romance by killing your mate with a shot through the head. You would have to be completely detached from this lackluster, undead version of your former love or best friend. It would be a moment you would definitely remember for the rest of your life.

The most important thing you’d have to keep in mind is that this zombie is no longer a human being, and therefore, not your friend. Unlike some of the best zombie or demon characters in our favorite horror, science fiction and fantasy flicks, these are shells of the people they once were. Once you fully comprehend this, a plan would need to be made and executed, no pun intended.

If we do actually wake up in an apocalypse world populated with brain-craving zombies, or if the Uni-Gov somehow turns all of us Pearls into the undead if we don’t mate by 18, then it seems like the solution is pretty straightforward. You would start by creating the quickest, most efficient way to eradicate the zombie—there is definitely no room for mistakes here. The last thing you want to do is prolong your loved ones’ suffering. From everything I’ve read in young adult books and seen in fantasy and adventure films, the most efficient method seems to be a gunshot through the head. Quick, simple, effective—the perfect combination.

If I actually woke up to Jamal the zombie, I would obviously be devastated. It would not only be the end to my fantasy romance, but my chances for survival would be cut in half at best. Yet I would cast that anxiety aside and do what I needed to do. That stands for everyone else in my life too. They would probably be after my brains anyway, so it would become a matter of my own survival.

Let it be known—if we wake up in an apocalypse world and I’ve become a brainless gut-muncher, you have my permission to kill me.

Source: i.zdnet.com

by eden

Full moon—romantic apocalypse or fodder for adventure romance novels?

March 8, 2012 in Adventure romance tips

The full moon in Virgo is here. While our oh-so-lovely Ethics Officer blogged about whether or not a full moon is a sign of an apocalypse world, I was inspired to blog about the full moon’s so-called effects on love. I’ve read about in everything from adventure romance novels and astrology texts to science fiction and young adult books, but I still don’t know what exactly to believe.

Clearly, the full moon is often used to inspire paranormal and supernatural elements in many young adult books. Think of all the character who turn from humans into werewolves at the sight of a full moon or the psychic phenomena attributed to its presence. It’s also very prevalent in my favorite genre— fantasy romance novels. Characters often have their first kiss in the light of the full moon or realize that they’ve found the one due to the clarity it brings them.

The moon is illuminated partly by direct sunlight, and when it’s “full,” we get to see it in its brightest, fullest state. In a series of amazing adventure romance novels that I recently finished, the protagonist always sees more clearly when there is a full moon. It’s like the truth is illuminated when the moon is full. She achieves the clarity to really hear her inner compass and make decisions about the issues in her life.

In one of my favorite fantasy romance novels, the truth is revealed to the main character when the moon is full. She experiences her first real breakup when the full moon helps reveal her boyfriend’s true character. Luckily, or through serendipity, she also meets the next love of her life during a full moon cycle.

Other young adult books with more of a paranormal romance angle talk about casting spells or invoking spirits during the full moon. It’s thought that magic is most powerful on the night of the full moon, and that spells dealing with otherworldly energies are strongest during this phase. In fact, several occult traditions believe the only time to cast love spells is during the full moon.

Whatever the reality is, all I know is I hope this full moon brings my true love to fruition. I only have a few months left to mate and my relationship with my favorite Coal is kind of a roller coaster. Maybe I’ll cast that love spell… or find my own clarity in its light. I just know I can count on something happening when it’s here.

Source: Freewiccaschool.com

Full moons—sign of the apocalypse world?

March 8, 2012 in Apocalypse World

Many people believe that every full moon is a sign of an apocalypse world—especially a blue moon. Even more believe that when the moon is full, emergency rooms and jails are packed, if not overflowing. These same people blame everything from increases in crime and psychotic behavior to stock market fluctuations and traffic accidents on the “lunar effect” of a full moon. If you ask me, they’ve read one too many romance fantasy novels.

History books reveal that in 19th-century England, lawyers often used the “not guilty by reason of the full moon” defense to get their clients off the hook—and it worked. Psychiatrist Arnold Lieber wrote a best seller, How the Moon Affects You, where he posited that since the human body is 65 percent water, the moon has the same effect on it that it has on the pull on the ocean’s tides. In actuality, he may have read too many romance fantasy novels himself.

While it’s easy to fall into the mindset that the full moon could bring the onset of an apocalypse world, especially with all the Mayan calendar hype, I would bet my life that it’s impossible.

Many studies have been conducted over the years, attempting to show that there really is such a thing as a “lunar effect.” A study of homicides in Dade County, Florida claimed that there was an upsurge in killings in the 24 hours before and after the full moon. However, other researchers in the same county claimed this to be pure urban fantasy due to the dubious statistical methods the other researchers has used. When the study was reevaluated, the findings were shown to be incorrect.

Another study claimed that more traffic accidents occurred during a full moon. More urban fantasy—the study was conducted on a weekend, when traffic accident statistics are higher in general. In 1985, two famous scientists, Rotton and Kelly, did what “meta-analysis” of 37 studies of the “lunar effect.” Their research culminated in this fact: the moon accounted for less than 3/100 of 1 percent of the monthly variation.

Just like all the other rumors of the impending apocalypse world, these claims of a lunar effect fall apart when looked at closely. You don’t need to be a historian to realize this—you just need to be able to look at the facts. The reasoning about the moon having the same pull on our bodies as it does the ocean’s tide doesn’t make sense. Tides don’t occur just once or twice a month like a full moon does—they happen once or twice a day. At full and new moons, the sun, earth and moon are lined up, resulting in higher tides. Plus, the change in tides rarely is greater than 10 feet.

Keep reading your science fiction and fantasy books, but don’t let them get you in a tizzy. Chances are you have absolutely nothing to worry about, except for a nightmare or two.

Source: wayseers.eu

Are the rumors true—or is it just science fiction and fantasy?

March 2, 2012 in Urban Fantasy

We all know it’s the year 2012 and if you’re a science fiction and fantasy aficionado, you’ve heard all the theories about the end of the world. Predictions of swine flu and H1N1 outbreaks, terrorist attacks, wars in the Middle East, global warming and The Great Meltdown are rampant. Yet are they backed by any bit of truth whatsoever or are they simply fodder for the next best urban fantasy novels?

December 21, 2012 is the actual end of the 5,126-year Mayan calendar, aka a sign of the apocalypse. If I were a science fiction and fantasy writer, I’d be basing my next novel around that. I can see the marketing campaign now 12/21/12—the end of a beautiful mess. The numbers are perfect and the possibilities endless.

Hundreds of thousands of young adults (and some not-so-young) are lining up to see the latest dark urban fantasy and dystopian novels turned into films. There seems to be a fascination, albeit a little sick, with watching the future-as-a-nightmare come to fruition. Young adult books with dystopian titles are being released by the masses, with fans letting their imaginations run amok with scenarios of everything from viruses and flesh eating zombies to totalitarian leaders and an absolute scarcity of food and other resources.

As we wonder what the future holds, could we actually be manifesting these pipe dreams into reality? If books like The Secret and other pop culture phenomena touting the power of our thought and the Law of Attraction are accurate, and readers continue flocking to read and set their attention on the latest young adult books with post apocalyptic scenarios, we could theoretically set these disastrous circumstances into motion, couldn’t we? As people everywhere, Pearls and Coals alike, stockpile food and weaponry, prepare for zombie altercations and obtain vaccinations for the most obscure diseases, aren’t they actually setting their intention on creating these exact circumstances?

Regardless of what 2012 brings us, the obsession seems to have only begun. As we continue to work to save the Pearls, the rest of our population seems focused on all these imaginary, mythical threats. Perhaps focusing on a world of fantasy is the only way some can deal with impending doom. Either way, we’ll keep trying to help as many Pearls as possible survive their real life threats and face their ultimate destiny.

Source: Open.Salon.com

Hand to Hand combat training—A must for an apocalypse world

March 1, 2012 in Apocalypse World

In an apocalypse world, women are going to need much more than a can of pepper spray to defend themselves—and nothing compares to the effectiveness of hand to hand combat training. While the sound of it may make some women pretty uncomfortable at first, after hearing about the looting and pillaging and all other crimes that may be a rampant part of post apocalypse life, the latter obviously sounds a lot worse.

Let’s face it: hand to hand combat skills can help you survive on a daily basis in an apocalypse world. We’re not talking the kind of training that takes place in an afternoon either. While you may learn some helpful skills, like how to react to a perilous situation without much thought, there are too many methods of attack—it would be impossible to cover them all in one afternoon, let alone in one month. Plus, it takes lots of practice to truly react quickly in situations requiring self-defense—and we’re talking about a completely dangerous, dog-eat-dog (or zombie-eat-human) world, not the settings we read about in young adult fantasy novels.

To truly improve your chances of survival, regular training is a must. In addition to getting in to the best physical shape possible, we suggest signing up for at least one type of martial arts school. Cut down some of the the time you invest in your adventure romance and direct it to taking as many classes as possible. Some great fighting styles include Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Kenpo Karate, Muy Thai, Tae Kwon Do, Capoeira, Kung Fu and old school Kickboxing.

In addition to taking martial arts classes, you may even want to learn some boxing moves. Taking a few boxing classes is a great way to build stamina and endurance while learning how to throw and block punches. Plus, if you are in the throes of an adventure romance, you can suggest taking classes together as an exciting type of date and bonding experience.

Another great self-defense system that all of us at Save the Pearls recommend is Krav Maga. Developed in Israel, Krav Maga is an eclectic form that involves wrestling, grappling and striking techniques. It’s got a heavy focus on real world scenarios and is extremely brutal and efficient. Maybe not your idea of a walk in the park, but again, we’re trying to prepare you for hand-to-hand combat in an apocalypse world, not the imaginary futures of young adult fantasy novels. Good luck!

Source: Frontroomcinema.com

by eden

My favorite films about an apocalypse world

February 29, 2012 in Eden's Posts

With the doom and gloom of my 18th birthday looming over me, it’s hard not to think about life in an apocalypse world. So lately, whenever I need a little escape, I’ve been watching movies about life after the so-called end of the world. That way, I can multitask—I’m relaxing, but I’m also coming up with survival tips and learning about life in the aftermath. After watching these new favorites, I’ll be prepared for pretty much anything, from the Uni-Gov knocking on my door to zombies furiously craving my brains. Usually, I’m all about reading science fiction and fantasy books in my spare time, but for now, I’m walking through a dystopian wonderland.

Zombieland. I love this movie, maybe because Emma Stone is just so charismatic and Woody is so hilarious. Or maybe it’s because I’ve always wanted to see what a Twinkie tastes like. Emma Stone and Jesse Eisenberg experience their own brand of romantic apocalypse in this movie, so I totally relate to it. Plus, I think that’s really what an apocalypse world is going to look like.

The Day After. This film offers a graphic, disturbing concept of an apocalypse world—it takes place in a small town in Kansas after a nuclear holocaust devastates the United States. This movie freaked people out hard when it was released in the 80s, and kinda freaked me out too.

Planet of the Apes. This film is an absolute science fiction and fantasy legend! Even though I’m young, I prefer old school stuff, so I actually like the original more than the remake. “Ape City” is a scary prospect—not sure what I’d do if walking, talking gorillas captured me. Maybe a young Charlton Heston type would save me! The ending has an amazing cinematic twist.

On the Beach. This is the ultimate romantic apocalypse movie. Earth’s only survivors of a nuclear holocaust come together in Australia—until radiation gets them. The movie’s cool old school cast includes Ava Gardner, Gregory Peck, Fred Astaire and Anthony Perkins. The ending is super shocking.

Dawn of the Dead. The second in George A Romero’s Living Dead series brings the zombie epidemic in an apocalypse world to a whole new level. As the dead rise and prey on human flesh, we follow a group of survivors who barricade themselves inside a shopping mall, basically waiting for the undead to get in and for it all to just be over with. Ahhh, so uplifting!

Source: Chriscad.com

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