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by eden

Fantasy romance—is honesty key?

December 29, 2011 in Eden's Posts

Is honesty crucial for having a successful fantasy romance? People have told me that without it, a relationship is destined to fail. In young adult books, there’s always some sort of repercussion or punishment for not telling the truth. Yet aren’t there some things that can be excluded to save another’s feelings? Aren’t there some small details that you can hide from your partner if they don’t ask? Does your perfect mate really need to know everything—I mean, does Jamal really need to see me apply my Midnight Luster or know that I have to wear three coats of it?

Isn’t keeping the fantasy romance alive more important than your mate knowing every single detail about you? There’s something about mystery that makes someone hotter. I’m beginning to think that while it’s important to be honest about some things, being too open can massacre love. While honesty is literally about telling the truth when asked a question, openness falls under the TMI category (too much information!). Constantly spitting out the truth when no one’s asking can ruin some of the relationship’s fantasy and adventure.

The protagonists in young adult books often end up in successful relationships, though in the beginning they may be hiding a secret. While lying about something can possibly ruin even the strongest fantasy romance, so can offering TMI. It may be good to share all your feelings with your perfect mate, yet will intimacy really be lost if you tell them about all of your exes? There may be some truth to that the old adage, “What you don’t know doesn’t hurt you.” Is it worth it more to keep the fantasy and adventure alive in your relationship or should you tell all? Clearly, one choice sounds more fun than the other. Let me know what you guys think!


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Is the Apocalypse World upon us?

December 22, 2011 in Apocalypse World

Since the solstice is upon us, many are talking about all the signs and rumors around the future existence of an apocalypse world. While I agree that we should prepare for the worst, at the same time, some of these rumors have no basis and others simply stem from a paranoid mentality. Many cite the Gulf oil spill, the tsunami in Japan, various earthquakes throughout the world and the uprisings in the Middle East as indicators of the end of the world. In reality, science shows us that these natural disasters are exactly that, and not the result of the anger of the gods above. This is not science fiction and fantasy—this is a real world we live in, and if we have anything to worry about, it’s The Heat or the inability to find a mate.

Many others, especially those who spend their days buried in  young adult fantasy books, refer to the “Mayan prediction of the 2012 apocalypse.” They cite the Mayan’s ability to predict future events, but there is no physical evidence of the 2012 prediction—they simply had a calendar system that ended in 2012. The Mayans never said the world would end that year, and modern day Mayans show irritation at this widespread rumor. Again, more fodder for science fiction and fantasy books.

In terms of other “signs” of an apocalypse world referred to by proponents of this rumor, oil spills happen often—according to the Union of Concerned Scientists, approximately one billion gallons of oil spills into oceans each year. While devastating, natural disasters like earthquakes and tsunamis have occurred for thousands of years. And we’re still here, aren’t we?

While they may not be written about in the oh-so-popular young adult fantasy books, uprisings in the Middle East have gone on since the beginning of time.

Whether or not 2012 brings “the end,” via the Heat, the Uni-Gov or the apocalypse of 2012, people are capitalizing on it. There’s been a flood of films, young adult books, survival kits and more to hit the marketplace. It sounds like a hoax and a half to this Ethics Officer! The only real threat of an apocalypse we really have to worry about is the one caused by the Heat or what the Uni-Gov has in store for Pearls. Instead of falling for the hype, my advice is to spend your time trying to find a mate or a way to permanently protect yourself from the heat.



Surviving a romantic apocalypse

November 16, 2011 in Apocalypse World

We’ve all been there—one day, you’re happy and the next, you’re immersed in a full-fledged romantic apocalypse. It seems like your world is ending, and you just know that you’ll never get over it. Relax—there are ways you can heal your heart and start thinking about an adventure romance again, even when you’re living in a post apocalypse world.

Don’t jump back in.
Give yourself some time to heal, without dating or having sex. Read some young adult fantasy books, clean out your closets, do spa nights at home and just take care of yourself.

Work it out.
Hit the gym, go for walks, do yoga and take up a new form of exercise. This gives you time to clear your head and get your endorphins going, while relieving some of the stress that accompanies a broken heart. Plus, regular workouts will get you looking hot for your next and keep you prepared for obstacles in this post apocalypse world.



Write it out.
Spend some time every morning writing your thoughts down in a journal. Who knows—maybe your stories could become a best-selling series of young adult fantasy books!

Rest up.
Sleep and exercise can help you avoid depression. Make sure to get in a solid eight hours. Taking care of yourself physically will help your emotions heal faster, and you need to be well-rested so you can defend yourself in this apocalypse world.

This is the perfect time to assess your role in the breakup and what your patterns may be. A broken heart can inspire change and lead you towards your next young adult fantasy romance.

Eat well.
Don’t fall into emotional eating—avoid comfort food and overeating, and stock your refrigerator with fresh, healthy foods. Keep in mind that cooking can be therapeutic—and it’s an impressive skill to flaunt when you’re trying to find a mate for a young adult fantasy romance.

Don’t be hard on yourself.
Give yourself credit for what you did well in your relationship and learn from its demise. It’s your turn to grow, just like the protagonists in all of our favorite young adult fantasy books.

If you want some tips for keeping your fantasy romance alive, click here.

The Exclusivity Factor

September 22, 2011 in Apocalypse World

Since a fundamental part of The Save the Pearls campaign is to help Pearls find the perfect mate and navigate the world of dating and mating, it’s also our mission to provide strategies for creating a successful relationship. Eden Newman had an awesome question for us this week: how do you know if your relationship is exclusive? That’s a question almost everyone faces in their adventure romance, and since we’re not all living in the world of Harlequin romance novels, it takes work to create the young adult romance you’re dreaming of.

After browsing online dating profiles so you can find a mate—the perfect mate, of course, you may date for a period of time and not be sure of your status. Here are some things to look for so that you don’t suddenly find yourself immersed in a romantic apocalypse rather than a young adult fantasy romance.

Getting it together.
After weeks of sorting through online dating profiles and going on dates, you think you’ve found someone cool. Often times, people spend a lot of time interacting online before actually meeting in person—instead make sure you’re going to social activities and events together. Get some quality time in so that you can see if it’s really a fantasy romance in the making.

Getting introduced to the friends.
You can be sure your young adult fantasy romance is headed in the right direction if your date brings you around their friends. It means that they are confident being seen with you if they bring you to parties or their regular hangouts. If their friends knew about you in advance, even better. This factor ranked particularly high with Pearls, but much lower in interracial relationships or those that were in casual, interracial dating situations.

Meeting the Family
One of the most nerve wracking events in any adventure romance is meeting the family. If you’re dating and mating and the one you like introduces you to his family, there’s a good chance they’re taking this seriously. Likewise, a bad interaction with the family can lead to the demise of your young adult romance and place you on the verge of—you guessed it, romantic apocalypse. This factor ranked extremely high with Coals, lower with Pearls, and lowest among interracial relationships. However, it was a major concern for our lovely Eden Newman.

Stylin’ and Profilin’
Has your quest to find a mate been a whirlwind of fantasy romance, the exact stuff of Harlequin romance novels? Do you go out to nice restaurants or are you still meeting up at the club? Do you start the night together or are you just getting a booty call? This isn’t a young adult fantasy novel—it’s reality. Look at how and where you spend your time together and you’ll know whether you’re on the serious track or the friends with benefits path.

Whether you’re interested in interracial dating or learning how to create a young adult fantasy relationship, the Save the Pearls site will give you all the resources you need for this journey.

by eden

Make him chase you…

September 22, 2011 in Eden's Posts

So we’ve been flirting—yes, me and the one. He’s so like subtly sexy, I can’t stand it. He came up to me while I was filing a report and asked a question, but I couldn’t hear a thing. It’s like my senses blended all together. His arm brushed mine and it was straight electricity! I know I must be sounding like one of those old school Harlequin romance novels or young adult fantasy romance books, but whatever! I know what I feel, and it’s the first time I’ve ever had a feeling like that about someone. I wonder if he feels it for me too? I know the whole interracial dating thing might be an obstacle for him, but how could anyone ever resist this? I will play my cards right, even though I don’t have much time. What is it I read in one of those young adult romance advice columns—make him chase you?

by eden

Waiting, waiting… and mating

July 27, 2011 in Eden's Posts

Things have been quiet lately. Still no word about the missing sisters, and no one’s talking about it now. Because they’re all afraid, of course. So I’m focusing my attention on my ever-plummeting mate rate. I’m thinking maybe if I beef up my special skills, lol, that will help my situation. Any ideas? Maybe some aerial yoga or trapeze classes would help the situation. Or maybe if I learned like two different languages. Not that I have enough time to do that—I only have about six months left. Are cooking skills especially appealing to guys? From what I’ve seen, it seems like it’s all about attractiveness. Ugh, this is so frustrating.

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